O! Government nanny! To whom we scrape and bow.
Protect us from our stupidness, it doesn’t matter how.

O! Government nanny! With trump and harp so glad
Your bureaucrats cocoon me from the freedom I once had.

O! Government nanny! With laurels ’bout your head
Who saves me from the foreign wars and sends my wife instead.

O! Government nanny! With gold and silver hair
Come nickel, dime, and quarter us until our cupboard’s bare.

O! Government nanny! With drones from sea to sea
Strike down allegéd evil ones before they come strike me.

O! Government nanny! With hearts about to burst
We pledge allegiance to our new commandment: “Safety first!”

~ Jon Swerens